For any couple setting off on their ‘virgin’ Funnymoon, we recommend you pay that little bit extra at your hotel of choice and take up the Club Privileges.

While alcohol is always to be taken in moderation, only a fool or a wowzer would deny there are certain situations which cannot be ‘kick started’ by a Sauvingnon Blanc or three. (Ladies: remember, we do not have the muscle mass to break down alcohol at the same rate as the guys, so if you want to be awake when you hit the 1000 count feather duvet-covered bed, slow down. If not, well, that is your decision, but my personal experience is that the closer you get to midnight, the narrower a man’s definition of happiness, if you get my drift.)

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These Funnymooners have taken full advantage of their Club Privileges. On the top floor of the Parkroyal on Pickering we enjoy complimentary afternoon tea and Happy Hour from 6.30 to 8.30. Free drinks is enough to bring a smile to anyone’s face.

There are downsides to the relative intimacy of Club Level. Last night we were both somewhat put off by the Sleazy Business man and his girlfriend. We observed her guzzling champagne and reading Miffy while the 60 year old boss chatted up the lovely female staff on the Club Floor. We wondered about his two sub-lings, gathered about him in their business suits: what did they think of this display? We will never know; they both resorted to their phones and we left for No Signboard.